Sunday, January 13, 2008
Something sad to talk about
I wondered why last night I had this thought in my mind after I woke up. Everything just came back flowing into me. Wasn't the best memories you desired but it was just something I wished to put away permanently. All the bad memories to be thrown away which I thought I already had. But I just wouldn't forget, it's just so hard. It made my heart bled and my tears flowed whenever I start to think about what he done to me in the past.
Whenever it happens I would feel lonely and emptiness inside me all over again. I just wished there was someone there to care about me. Simple request but hard to fulfill. No matter how hard I tried to fill up all of that emptiness, it can never be full again. This was something built up over the years. I am losing all the hope already. Just a few more years and I will be freed.
Little realised is that I was never happy. They thought that I would. Little people would understand what's really in me. I do not wish to talk about the past any furthur as it was so disappointing. I just feel like telling him to f off and stop being a hypocrite. Given our relationship, I still hated him for what he's done to me. I don't like people to make it up to me at the end of the day. What's done is done. It can never be reversed.
Little people know about this blog so I suppose it's alright anyway to talk about it. It made me felt a lot better already. =)
10:48 AM
