Wednesday, January 30, 2008
CNY celebration
Today was a good day. Took off for the morning slept till very shuang. Meet up with Mdm at about 11am. Things screwed up a bit and they called to say the buffet will not start till 12 plus. So we went shopping and walked around. Went to Phoon Huat, it's a shop that sells baking needs. Kelvin also joined us and walked around.
Mdm wanted to try how to make jelly so she bought 2 trays and the ingredients. After that, we went to sakura to start the buffet first. We took a lot of stuff. I had shrimp wanton, dumpling, chicken wings, squid skewer, sushi, chicken chop, medium size abalone (it was in slices by the way), prawns, scallops and a lot more. When they came, we were already half done.
Then we moved on to cakes. Had black forest cake, mango cake, green tea cake, chocolate fondue, chocolate cake and jelly. Next I had 2 balls of ice cream to myself and the crazy part came. Me and Gregg went to make a mini "earthquake". We scooped all the flavours of the ice cream available. It was craziness. But it was shiok!
After the buffet, we had presentation of ORD plaque. Where's mine? Zzz... Nobody wanted to go anywhere so I went home and had an afternoon nap. Met glen up for pool and that's about it. Haha...
8:05 PM
Monday, January 28, 2008
Brand new weekWell, my sister has changed her mind after persuading her for a long time. Partially thankful for mar cause I discussed it with her that day. Owe her a meal lo. I mean all paths are equal. So long you are good it doesn't matter really.
Got very fed up when I saw the workplan in March. So much staying in. Oh god... guess I must start to store up food in camp again. So that I will have something to eat instead of out rationing which I hated it.
Saw clara coming out of the train this morning. Was in a bit of shock. Suddenly saw her. just waved but didn't talk much. In a real hurry this morning cause I am running late.
Went for my usual run this evening. I wonder why am I still running despite I am getting a bit sick of it. Crazy me. Planned to slack this whole weekend. Getting very tired these few days. Guess I should just rest up even it's for one weekend.
10:00 PM
Sunday, January 27, 2008
The "BTC" is formed!
Met up with yaxin, mar & glen yesterday. Went to soup restaurant for lunch at DFS. Yaxin went in first to look for places while mar & I walked over. The most stupid thing is that we took the wrong escalator in DFS and had to go down all over again. Lunch was good. We had soup each obviously. But the only one I loved was the chicken meat. Goes really nice with their ginger sauce. The rest was only of acceptable standard unfortunately. There was minced meat with salted fish which was very bland. There was broccoli with mushrooms which I hated broccoli in itself cause I had so much of it in camp. But the salad prawns were okay. It was quite nice. Very fussy huh?
Went shopping after that. Me & glen took a seat while the girls look around for stuff. Guys are always so lazy... Then yaxin and mar suddenly suggested forming some "BTC" meaning "Big Tummy Club". LOL... super disgusting. But it kinda fits the description. I somehow became a member. Sob sob... But it was funny as well. I must maintain my flat tummy for my health's sake. Lol... Glen was made the president and he was rather pissed about it. Haha...
We went to play pool and yaxin made a reservation at Coca. Had our dinner there was quite good. I can still remember what I eaten. The long list includes: tiger prawns, squid, fortune fish balls, fish glue, wanton,pork slice, cockles, black fungus, straw mushroom, flower crab and seriously a lot more. After all the eating, we were comparing whose tummy was the biggest but I wouldn't say who won. Haha... Basically we were all "pregnant".
Went to do some shopping. Looked around here and there before going home. Just super tired but a very nice day all over again.
8:42 AM
Saturday, January 26, 2008
人生的意义
人为了什么而活？一天天辛苦的奋斗又是为了什么？每天不断努力的为了家庭，不怕辛苦，只为了一个更好的明天。遗憾的是，不但得不到他人的了解，所换来的是失望及悲伤。这样下去值得吗？看着她一天天消瘦，我的心仿佛像被一把刀一刀一刀 地刺下去。
而我呢？我到底又是为了什么？日子好像是在折磨我。尽管我期盼明天的到来，可惜的是我得不到我盼望到的快乐。虽然说，不管前面的路有多艰难，还是要勇敢地走下去。可是我缺乏这份勇气。老实说一句，我对生活已经没有多大的期待。毕竟每天都一样痛苦，连活着的意义也渐渐消失了。
经过忙碌的一天, 却成为他发泄的一种道具。难道把你生活的痛苦建立在我的生上，这就是你能做出的最好的选择？需要我帮忙就对我好，平时就对我冷淡。又常发脾气，我好疲倦。
难不成要见到我死了以后，您才会停止吗？不只是他，连小的也学习他的"好榜样"。不听话也就算了，常常大小声？到底几时才会更成熟一些？
我真的好累，好想永远永远的休息。
8:59 AM
Friday, January 25, 2008
PissedI am very pissed off by my sister today. Her results turned out to be okay. Not good for a JC but relatively enough to get into a course in poly. Yet she wants to stay in that MI. Not that I am against the school but it speaks relatively for itself. I mean it's better to graduate with a dip rather than going MI. What if she can't make it in A levels? She is wasting not 2 but 3 years. I don't want her to walk the footsteps of others who made the same mistake.
Yet she is so against my views. Saying that it is much better to stay in MI. I said well it's her choice. But now she wants to go into a private uni. Worst of all, she wants my mom to sign a loan to sponsor her studies of over 40k. I mean look at our situation. Stop being unreasonable. We can barely afford good things in life and yet she chooses this.
I don't mind if she signs the bond but why make my mom sign? She's not the one studying. And how do you expect her to pay off the loan? In a few years to come by, it's her turn to enjoy life not to spend the rest of her time paying off a loan for some idiot who doesn't deserve it.
I simply don't want my mom to be burden down by a loan. Life is already harsh to her. I don't wish to see anything worse. Haix... Maybe I would even consider signing a loan for my studies and give up what is available for my own. I mean I would rather I be burden by it than my mom. I wish my sister would be more sensible...
I wonder what can I do or say to make her more sensible. If I could die to make her realise I don't even mind. Haix... I wished I could just cry all my troubles away. I wished I would never have to wake up to face all of this. =(
And sorry to someone whom I promised not to go beyond 2 drinks. Just let me be. At least for tonight.
6:27 PM
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Tired & busy week
Haven't blogged for a few days due to several reasons. Firstly, there is a lot of work to be done in camp. Mdm wants to finish her FY07 before she leaves so have to help her with a bit of things. I just hate it cause I will spend the whole day cracking my head over the endless stack of papers. So it kinda gets on my nerves. Wasn't in the mood for anything this week really.
Also, there are a lot of things to pack up in the store. To clean up everything neat and tidy before the handing over in case of any inspection. Honestly, the amount of dust accumulated was overwhelming. Swept the whole damn store. Luckily there was mark and teck liang to help out. Thanks a million dudes!
There was a lot of running to catch up with. Have to start training already or the 42km later will be a big disaster. No to worry. Clocking 40km per week I guess would be very sufficient. Wouldn't have that much time to run also.
Looking forward to my weekend. I am so bored of work. Just wish it would come quickly for me to enjoy up a bit! To relax myself. Cheers!
8:53 PM
Saturday, January 19, 2008
The shoes which I bought today
Shopping today
Started with a lame day. My sister initially agreed to go shopping with me but she went to poly open house. So I went myself as I didn't know what time she would be back. Went to ALDO to look for my shoe but there isn't any size which fits me. Got super irritated after trying a few other designs.
Walked furthur down for more shops. Something lame and funny happened. There was this 3 days in front of me then I happened to be between them. 2 girls was in front and 1 was behind. Then e girl behind asked for water. Her friend in front passed it w/o looking so I took the water from her. Lol... then her friend behind shouted and the girl turn ed and was shocked. Haha.. returned the water and walked away.
Then got into this shop where I saw this lee coopers shoe. But there was no size in the end. Very sian. Saw OG and I saw the same exact shoes. Furthur more, it's on 20% discount. Haha... best of all, my size was avaliable so i bought it immediately. Then shopped around for a small box and ribbon also. To make it look presentable lo. Lol...
And that's about it, went home after that. Super tired.
9:05 PM
Friday, January 18, 2008
My crazy shopping spree
Today was one good day of crazy shopping for me. Actually wanted to go with andy and ka sheng but ka sheng fell sick so we just had to go without him. We two went to BHG first to look around for shoes. The initial idea was to get my shoes buy andy saw something he liked. It was a black shoe with yellow stripes. Very nice. I wanted to get brown covered shoes but I couldn't find anything suitable. Was a bit sad but it didn't matter to me. I can take my time.
We then went bugis street and andy bought a jeans which was a bit like mine. The colour was very nice and I liked it very much too. But I didn't want to get the same design. We strolled around for a while and saw this shop. I chanced upon a black collar tee with white stripes. I liked it very much. Seriously fitting. Also saw another long sleeved black shirt. Got both of them. The price was very reasonable. $38 for both items.
Then went to the shopping centre nearby. Shopped for present for someone (you should know). Wouldn't reveal it here. Didn't want to spoil the surprise but I suppose it's simple and elegant. I myself liked it very much. Wanted to have dinner but everywhere was so full. Argh... Then went to shop for my jeans. Got a black jeans from freshbox. I got a shock when my waist went down by 2 inches. I slimmed down! Finally! So happy. Andy is so so jealous. Lol...
I am suddenly in the mood for black colour but it fits me very well though. Since this is so I guess I would get black shoes as well to go with everything. It just happens to be so. =)
9:23 PM
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Testing of black sesame paste
Today was a super busy day for me. So much things to be handled today. My days are always like that. When I am free, I am so free that I just stare in the blank air. When I am busy, I don't even have time to eat. It's nice to be busy once in a while I guess, it helps to keep unhealthy thoughts away. So many people is going to ORD soon which means I would have much lesser friends. Mine would be coming soon, not that far already.
Thanks to someone who wrote a post upon my "heavenly" request. Appreciated that lots. That someone also requested to eat black sesame paste this sat. It's a wonder why I never tried before despite me knowing quite a variety of desserts. But well, it's something new to try. So i had to experiment in advance to make sure it's edible. Cause my first attempt always turn out to be disastrous. Not really bad to that extent just wanna make sure it's of some standard.
Bought the ingredients today. Just black sesame and caster sugar. Just to share, caster sugar dissolves more easier than the sugar you use for coffee. So consider trying it if you need sugar for baking or desserts.
May visit http://jaschin.blog.com/262125/#cmts for more details.
My first attempt didn't turn out to be good. the paste turned out to be watery. I guess it's the blending part that gone wrong. I should have grind the sesame seeds before blending. I also should sieve the misture before cooking. Overall was a not so bad first try but can be improved so much.
8:07 PM
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Happiness
Office is so empty today. However, I love days like this. Nobody will really bother about me. It gives me some freedom to do things which I liked. Had breakfast today with kelvin. He's ever so lazy to run. Then slack the whole day long and chatted with people. I am lucky I have someone to chat in the office instead of staring in the blank air.
Was raining after work today which made me a bit lazy to run. But the rain stopped shortly. So no more excuses. Went to my usual regime of 7.5 km and sit-ups. Haha... Just wanna keep going everyday like this and I will be glad enough.
Chatted a long time on the phone with my mistress yesterday. Made a stupid joke out of myself but it's okay. At least I made someone's day though it came late. Also talked about a lot of other things but sometimes it's really good to share your things with someone. Haha... I prefer to let my feelings out rather than keep them in.
Finally, I learnt something important about life. I learned the importance of happiness in my life. It's something that you cannot buy no matter how much money you have. Once it's lost, it's gone forever. I once neglected happiness over the value of money. But I promised myself it won't happened again. I cannot imagine such a simple thing took my 20 years of my life to realise that. But no fear, I am only at the starting point of my life time. =)
7:14 PM
Monday, January 14, 2008
Monday blues
Yesterday went to play pool with mar and glen at west coast recreation centre. Was a great way of killing my time since I was at bukit batok library. Actually was thinking of doing some window shopping when mar called me. So instead of spending the day alone, spending it with a friend would be much better. So went to play a few games and that's about it. Went home to rest up then chatted a while on the phone before going to sleep.
Today was a ridiculous day. Monday blues again. No mood to work totally. Went for a short run with kelvin. Guess he drank too much. He must cut down his tummy or he will have trouble clearing his IPPT. I felt lucky i cleared mine. Maybe I will try for a silver before I ORD. Just waited for e whole day for time to pass. Spend my whole day talking away. Nothing interesting happened.
When I came home, I went for my run. I did 12.5 km in about 1 hr 9 min. Relatively average timing. It was good but the weather seriously sucks. The rain just come and go. Freaking irritating. But I still finished the distance fortunately. So I clocked 15 km already. A great start I would say. Another 25km to go. Probably add one gym session this week if I have enough time or probably I would try to finish my 40km and that's it. That's all for today. Update again when I have the mood all over again.
7:59 PM
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Something sad to talk about
I wondered why last night I had this thought in my mind after I woke up. Everything just came back flowing into me. Wasn't the best memories you desired but it was just something I wished to put away permanently. All the bad memories to be thrown away which I thought I already had. But I just wouldn't forget, it's just so hard. It made my heart bled and my tears flowed whenever I start to think about what he done to me in the past.
Whenever it happens I would feel lonely and emptiness inside me all over again. I just wished there was someone there to care about me. Simple request but hard to fulfill. No matter how hard I tried to fill up all of that emptiness, it can never be full again. This was something built up over the years. I am losing all the hope already. Just a few more years and I will be freed.
Little realised is that I was never happy. They thought that I would. Little people would understand what's really in me. I do not wish to talk about the past any furthur as it was so disappointing. I just feel like telling him to f off and stop being a hypocrite. Given our relationship, I still hated him for what he's done to me. I don't like people to make it up to me at the end of the day. What's done is done. It can never be reversed.
Little people know about this blog so I suppose it's alright anyway to talk about it. It made me felt a lot better already. =)
10:48 AM
Fun Day
I met up with yaxin and mar yest. Glen wasn't here because he joined our ex-JJ classmates for an outing. But being with the girls was good as well. So no problems. We agreed to meet at tanjong pagar at bout 12:30 pm. But surprise surprise yaxin was so early. Oh gosh! Think she arrived the same time as me. Totally rare. Haha...
When mar came along, we went to have lunch at a market nearby. We all had fish soup with maggi mee. Lol... It was great. I loved the freshness of the fish. it was in a claypot so it still remained warm throughout. Nice food but it covered me in sweat. Haha... We had ice kacang after that. It was something new which I never tried before. It was covered in red bean paste. I enjoyed it as I loved red bean. Haha... Saw mar's family as well.
Then we went to plaza singapura to get tickets after yaxin finished with her banking. We then played arcade. I loved it as it is a great stress relief for me. I just could forget my troubles when playing. Caught the show at 4:05 pm, Eastern Promises. I wouldn't say it was a great show. Just that the plot didn't turn out like I expected it to be. The whole thing was a twist. But overall I would give it a 3/5.
Went to have fish soup after the show. It was very irritating. I ordered 2 fish soup with milk. When it came it was clear soup so I asked for milk. The cashier insist that it must be clear soup and that I should look at e menu more carefully. We argued for a while and the staff inside said to bring it back and put milk inside. Hey customer rights okay. Haha...
Went for shopping after that. Managed to see some clothes I wanna buy. but let's save it till the end of the month alright. That's when you really expend your pay. Yeah! Arcade again after that. Walked the ladies to the bus stop before I went home too.
Days with them is always good. =)
10:24 AM
Friday, January 11, 2008
It's a weekend!
Well, just to summarise. I was sick for this whole week. Got slightly fatter from all the eating as I didn't exercise at all. But it's really fine. Most important thing is to recover. Glad that I could start on monday again. Probably it's because I am a lot happier that's why it went away quickly or maybe a bit of care and concern hasten up the process. =)
Have been really busy these few days. To wrap up things properly to make sure things goes right. Glad to say that it's a weekend again and one more week just went past. No worries just that I got to count it bit by bit. Just don't think too much of things and it will go away.
Yesterday went to have nights out with andy, teck liang, ka sheng, mark and our "big brother". Haha... was really cool. Waited at mac for andy for him to finish his driving theory. This idiot booked 6:45 pm slot and thought he has booked for 6:15 pm slot. Rushed down on a cab and then found it out later. Lamer!
When he finally joined us, we went to have dinner at long john silver's. Budget okay. Simply because the pay is not out yet and I am damn broke. Then went to K pool to play. I lost again. Haha... To me, enjoying is all what it matters.
Went to watched american gangsters after that. It was a good show. It's about a black who made a fortune for himself from selling drugs imported from other countries. He is simply fantastic to plan all that. I shan't spoil the ending. You should see it for yourself.
Tomorrow is a weekend and it's my only day of enjoyment in a whole week. Definitely will have a good day ahead. Shan't disappoint myself as it is the only day I waited for in a whole week. Shall go window shopping now and see anything catches my eye!
5:48 PM
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Taken at Riverside Indonesia Restaurant
Me & yaxin
Sick
Today is one of the worst starts to the year as I fell sick. It was really very sickening. I rather go to work. I hate the idea of lying in a bed and waiting to recover. This feeling is seriously idiotic. But I got no choice. Better to sit back and recover quickly. I do not want to be sick during weekends and stay at home. Weekends are really important to me.
Being sick means I have to skip all my running this week. I couldn't possibly run in this state. I think my body is asking me for a good rest. Guess I have to just listen to it to prevent any injuries so that I wouldn't make it even worse.
Saw a doctor today and took the medicine. It really puts me on the bed as I just slept throughout. Couldn't really be bothered about calls. I am just so tired as I really longed for a rest like that.
Being sick makes me think a lot. Honestly, I wished there was someone by my side to accompany me when I am sick. But with both my parents working and my sister in school, I guess I just have to close my eyes and sleep. Nonetheless, someone still bothered to ask me yesterday about it. Felt really happy that there is people who still cares. At least someone still remembers.
12:46 PM
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
My new year resolutions
This blog is a continuation of one which was lost very long ago. Haha... suddenly had the interest to "revive" it. Deleted all past entries and start afresh. Had been enjoying myself for the past one month in Dec. It was a really a great month. For once I really felt the smiles coming back to my face again. Must thank lots of friends for that and giving me support when I needed it most. I will forver be grateful.
Spent lots of money as well. Got to start to save up as school will be starting soon for me. And comes along with the money issues. Well, just don't want to read too much into it. I will just take one step at a time. Lol... Nothing in the world is worthy of man's anxiety.
But right now I just hope for more company. Happier days to look forward to and going out more with my friends. Just wanna enjoy myself truly. This sat I am going to catch eastern promises with yaxin and mar. Probably to eat sakura after that. Eating more and more, guess I have to exercise more. Yest just went Raj's Inn to celebrate Gregg's promotion. The food was really great and affordable. Not very expensive. I ate till my stomach seriously exploding. but I haven't feast in such a long time.
It's a start of a new year so there are bound to be resolutions. One thing for sure I have to be a better person. I am also thinking of doing volunteer work too. Haha... You always feel good helping others. And I need to start training up for marathon. Haha... don't know why I suddenly took a interest. But I am joining this year's sundown marathon and standard chartered marathon. Good for health also.
Looking forward to overseas trip nx year with yaxin, mar & glen if they could spare e time to go. I really just wanna go enjoy myself and see something which is different instead of buildings all day.
Also, valanetine's is nx month. I shall check what should I buy. Something did caught my eye and I am thinking bout it right now. I only think about my weekends and going out with my friends. Besides that, I just slack all day and wait for my precious ORD. Take care all. Shall update soon enough.
8:09 AM
